My grandma is the one who took care of me since I was lil girl. Well, not only me.. my 2 lil bro n my other lil sis.
My grandma is the one who will make the unique 'air asam' for me when there's nothing spicy for me to eat for dinner.
My grandma is the one who will make me the most yummylicious 'pajeri nenas' I've ever tasted in my entire life.
My grandma is the only one who'll do anything for me.
My grandma is the only one who can cook the best 'bengkang' a.k.a kuih bakar in the whole wide world universe.
Now..
There'll be none. NIL...
I did not manage to learn all those recipes from her..
I did not manage to learn all the cooking techniques..
I bought her an english cotton cloth..for her baju raya.. but I guess I'll never see her wear it ever again. My mum asked me the other day,to whom I wanna give the kain to..?? *silence*
I did not manage to meet her before she close her eyes forever..
However..
I manage to bath her for the last time..
I manage to put her last cloth on her..
I manage to kiss her cold forehead for the last time..
It's not much..it wasn't enough either.. but Allah has better plan for me.
INITIALLY there were 7 of us in the house NOW it's down to 5 (technically it's 4 as 1 is in Baling)
INITIALLY we need to drove 2 cars should we need to go anywhere..NOW 1 car is more than enough
INITIALLY I will always hear sumone membebel to me..NOW it's a lil bit too quiet
alas... my life will never be the same anymore..
It's been a pretty rough start for me... My emotion has been going on the roller coster mode ever since the month of February and it haven't stop yet. I am pretty sure abt it.
It's been pretty hard..at one point of time I feel like crying in the middle of work and obviously I can't let my colleague sees it.
Again..for the second time.. I decide nt to sit for my ACCA exam this sems. I dun think I can.
Almost everyday I'll wake up in the middle of the night..sometimes I manage to sleep back sometimes I end up crying in my room.
I just hope I'll be given enough strength to endure all this.
